It\u2019s Friday night, though it will probably be Saturday or later when you read this. That\u2019s because I post so freaking late.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Anyway, I need to start planning my posts a bit better. Otherwise I\u2019ll continue to scramble at the last minute trying to find something to write about. And it\u2019s not like I don\u2019t have things I want to write about, it\u2019s just some things I prefer to be\u2026not so spur of the moment.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Right now, as I\u2019m writing this, it\u2019s 9:50 at night and I\u2019m hungry as hell. I only ate a little organic popcorn and some watermelon today. I didn\u2019t start eating until after 5pm. That\u2019s because on Fridays I like to do this thing I call fasting and praying.\u00a0 It\u2019s basically where I disconnect from TV, social media, anything that isn\u2019t God-related \u2013 oh and food, and I just pray, all day.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
If that sounds boring it\u2019s because it is. I know, sorry, Jesus \u2013 though you know better than any of us. Boring or not, it\u2019s necessary to stay focused, for self-care and to remind myself my purpose in life.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
In actuality, it\u2019s not always boring, especially if I learn something new about myself, about how to be compassionate to others, and learn something new about God.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
It also really helps with my discipline. I have little to no discipline right now, so forcing myself not to eat, not to watch TV (my favorite) not to scroll through Instagram or Twitter, really builds a muscle that I can use.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
I\u2019m also working on ways I can make this time more fun. That\u2019s much harder considering the quarantine, It\u2019s something I have to look forward to when this is all over.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Today, I succeeded in not eating and not watching TV. The time I gave myself was between midnight and 5pm. There was a time when I could do it for 24 hours, and I\u2019ve even done it for two days, but I\u2019m going to have to build myself back up to that. I did not succeed in the praying part. As a matter of fact, I haven\u2019t picked up my Bible all day. I said a few short prayers for myself and my family, but that\u2019s it. Oh, and I also thanked the Lord for His blessings, but it was really quick, like less than an hour total probably.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
This is not to say that if you are a new Christian or believer that this is something you have to do to please God. Everyone\u2019s journey with the Lord is their own, so do what you can and let the Lord place on your heart what you need to do. But I\u2019ve been at this thing for a minute, and I really need to step up my game.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Now I\u2019m craving a steak \u2013 so random \u2013 and trying to figure out where I can get one for cheap. Since I like my steaks well-done, it\u2019s kinda hard to fuck that up even with a cheap steak.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
You may be thinking: \u201cWasn\u2019t she just talking about God and now she\u2019s using the f-word?\u201d Yes, that would be correct, I\u2019m a cussing Christian. I personally don\u2019t think God cares as long as I don\u2019t use my words to put others down. I remember I used to be in a Bible study and this lady would say fudge instead of fuck, which to me didn\u2019t make sense because when she said fudge she meant fuck, so why not just use the word. But I digress.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
I smell my Momma cooking something in the kitchen. Let me go check it out.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Until morrow\u2026 wait, no, Monday. And most likely that\u2019s Monday night.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
It\u2019s Friday night, though it will probably be Saturday or later when you read this. That\u2019s because I post so freaking late. Anyway, I need to start planning my posts a bit better. Otherwise I\u2019ll continue to scramble at the…<\/p>\n