My fired story won\u2019t be here today.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
I have a serious case of writer\u2019s block. Part of it\u2019s due to the subject matter. But I\u2019m starting to believe that a much bigger part of it is because I don\u2019t write often enough. I do it so seldomly that it\u2019s almost become a bit foreign to me. I need to practice my craft. I also need to read. And also do math \u2013 funny enough doing math helps me be a better writer. Writing came easiest to me when I did math on a regular basis, which was when I was in high school \u2013 I went all the way up to trigonometry. It was also back when I didn\u2019t know I was a writer. I was just writing as a form of self-expression \u2013 not so much to be creative, not to make art. I was also writing on assignment from a person in authority \u2013 my teacher. I wrote all my English papers at the very last-minute \u2013 sometimes 2nd<\/sup> period computer class last-minute and turned it in in my 4th<\/sup> period English class and still got an A. She was a pretty strict teacher too \u2013 only one other girl got As in that class all the time like me, and she was an avid reader. She was reading thick ass Stephen King books in the 11th<\/sup> grade. I don\u2019t know if he\u2019s a hard read or not, but any book that has a lot of pages is kind of a hard read for me \u2013 as in hard to keep my attention. I was barely reading the ones that were assigned.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Writing was so effortless back then, when I didn\u2019t think about it, when I didn\u2019t really care about it even. When I wasn\u2019t trying to be good but somehow it just was. That teacher was the one who told me I was a writer. Now I can\u2019t think of a time after that 11th<\/sup> grade class where writing wasn\u2019t hard.<\/p>\n\n\n\n No wait, I take that back. It was actually hard in that 11th<\/sup> grade class too, that is until the 11th<\/sup> hour. At the last minute, something always came to me. I could try to work on my writing a week or so in advance, and maybe I\u2019d think of an idea but I couldn\u2019t get it out, but the pressure of the last-minute always brought it out of me.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Not now. Now, when the last-minute comes, if I\u2019m not ready, if it\u2019s not complete to my liking, I give up at least for the time being. I haven\u2019t given up on my fired story. It will appear here one day \u2013 maybe tomorrow, hopefully tomorrow. I have over 9,000 words already written on that story and it\u2019s not even complete. Not to worry, I will edit the hell out of it. And some of it\u2014those 9,000 words–is an outline, some of it is just free writing. Some of it is me expressing my frustration with this writing process, some of it is redundant as hell and then of course, there\u2019s the actual story.<\/p>\n\n\n\n But for now, at 10:15pm I\u2019m going to play a little Wordle (that game really makes me feel smart) drink some orange juice, eat raisins (because writing makes me want to snack) and try again\u2026tomorrow.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" My fired story won\u2019t be here today. I have a serious case of writer\u2019s block. Part of it\u2019s due to the subject matter. But I\u2019m starting to believe that a much bigger part of it is because I don\u2019t write…<\/p>\n