Whew, that was a doozy.
I’m talking about my last post, Friendly Fire: The Serena Williams and Naomi Osaka Rivalry. I probably should have called that “tennis rivalry,” but oh well – I’ma just leave it now.
Writing that post was not fun at all – like at allllllll-la. And the thing is, I knew that was going to be the case. When the idea popped in my head, I knew it was going to be daunting, but I wanted to challenge myself. So I said self, c’mon, you can do this. Then I got started and was like self, what the hell were you thinking.
The funny thing is, when the idea first popped into my head, I knew exactly where I wanted to go with it. But still, the scope of it all was kinda vast, so I was intimidated and didn’t start on it right away. By the time I did start on it, I’d forgotten the initial plan of what I wanted to do and had no idea where I was now going to take it.
Another thing is, I didn’t know how much research would be involved in it. I have a pretty good memory, and I’ve been following Serena’s career for a minute, so practically everything in that story was from my memory. I did end up fact-checking a bit of it, but that’s a tedious process. As a result, I was very vague in some areas of the story where I wanted to be specific. For example, I wanted to give the exact year Serena turned pro instead of saying “sometime in the 90s” or however I referenced it. I also wanted to give specific instances of the racism and harassment she experienced-but again, lots (well not exactly lots, but enough to where I wasn’t prepared to do it…more like didn’t want to) of research. I was very general.
Then there was also the issue of what’s the moral of this story? I said all that to say what? It was hard for me to find one, because at that point I was just writing blindly. I was writing to finish what I started rather than trying to write anything of real substance, really.
As a writer I realize that everything I write is not going to be good. That sometimes I’m going to write shit. Yet that doesn’t stop me from wanting to produce stellar work Every. Single. Time.
Also, I kinda went in on the racism part, and I wondered if I came off as one of those Black people who hate White people, because I’m not. I love all God’s children, but I really wanted to put into context why I believe Serena suffered the adverse experience that she did.
I also wondered, in general, if it was clear. Did it make sense? Did it have a clear beginning a middle and an end?
If you are wondering what I was trying to say by that post – hell if I know. I guess, ultimately I’m just fascinated by both of them. I’m fascinated by anyone in general who beats the odds to obtain their dreams. I’m fascinated how Naomi Osaka is unafraid to take down the woman she calls her idol. I’m just fascinated by this whole idea of who’s more worthy when they play… so anyway.
Overall, I’m proud of myself for actually finishing the story and posting it. Over the years, I’ve written so many posts that never get posted, not only because I don’t like them, but also because I felt like it’s not good enough and I don’t even bother to finish them. This time I not only finished it but I also posted. I think it helped me that I told you I was going to do so.
Don’t get me wrong, I don’t think the post its terribly horrible, but ultimately, it’s not what I wanted it to be.
I guess the lesson here is some posts take more time than others, and I don’t write those types of stories enough to be able to crank one out in one week. I have to pace myself.
And while my lost post my seem all over the place for me, you just may get something out of it that I would have never expected…at least I hope you do.
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