As you guys know, I rarely read books. Instead, I watch a lot of TV and rely on incidents like the one that happened at the Oscars last Sunday to inspire stories I tell and the scenes and scenarios therein. It’s not about me copying the exact situation, but rather extrapolating the intensity of the emotions – at least as I gather them to be – from a real situation and applying them to the fictional ones I’m writing. These fictional scenarios or stories that I come up with may be similar to the one it was inspired by or totally different, just not the exact same.
So for example, I could write about a situation where someone is humiliated in front of a large crowd like Chris Rock was, or someone who overacts like Will Smith did. But, instead of these storylines occurring between Hollywood elites at an awards show, it will take place between average people at a dinner party – something like that.
When writing fictional characters, I’m obsessed with making them feel and sound as real as possible. To do that you have to study human behavior. You have to be interested in not just what people do, but why they do what they do. And for me, I have to be as nonjudgmental as possible. Which means that even though I have an opinion about who I think is right and who’s wrong, it’s important that I try to understand where each person is coming from so that I can give the character depth. And it is for that reason, and that reason alone, that after I witnessed the slap heard ‘round the world, I took a closer look at the Smith’s marriage.
It should go without saying, but you never know these days, so let me be clear: I don’t know these people. Any information I have on them is solely what I can gather from Google. It’s their television appearances, interviews in articles, stuff like that. And it’s not even an exhaustive search, because after years of doing this, I believe I’m so good, I believe I only need a little bit of evidence to tell the crux of the story. Kinda like you only need a little bit of a specimen to retrieve DNA. So again, I’m no professional. I have no formal training. I could be way off base, totally wrong. Still, bet you I’m right.
So after my careful analysis of the evidence that was put before me, I’ve concluded this was a lose, lose situation. Chris was at fault. Will sho nuff was at fault. However the main culprit here I think is Jada. That’s right Will’s wife, Jada Pinkett Smith.
I think what we have here is a situation where the woman is jealous of her husband, which, by the way, is interesting to me, because I’m more familiar with it the other way around. I’m more familiar with the man being jealous of the woman, if he’s dating a successful woman. Traditionally, women don’t mind taking a backseat to their husbands. Especially when you have a rich ass one like Will Smith. They’re willing to stay home, not work, have babies and live the glamourous life that their multi-million dollar husbands affords them.
Jada however, doesn’t seem to be one of those women. Actually, from what I can gather from my studies of those women, even those women are not those women. They too want their own identity apart from their husband and kids.
Jada didn’t come into a relationship with Will as a housewife in training. She came as a career woman with her own accomplishments, her own dreams, and goals in the same business as her husband, yet her career never took off like his did.
What an interesting spot for her to be in. It’s safe to say that had she never married Will, the way her career has panned out, she would not be among Hollywood’s elite, yet by association, she’s able to mix and mingle in circles that would otherwise be closed to her. And for an ambitious woman such as Jada, I can imagine that must be hard for her – to be in the thick of it but not actually a part of it. Now who knows for sure, but it looks to me that that’s created some jealousy.
So anyway, fast forward to a few years ago, this whole entanglement thing comes up. It just seems to me that she was doing things to try and emasculate her husband. Bringing Will to her red table and telling him in front of the world that she was with her son’s friend because she hadn’t felt good in such a long time? Whew, those are some words that can cut a man deep in private, let alone in public.
Will has always had a reputation for being soft – well, in certain circles – for rapping about parents and the summertime, instead of the mean streets of Philly. However, when he started having Big Willy Weekends and blowing up the box office, people had to start giving him his props to some extent. Then this shit came out about his wife cheating with someone half her age, and making fun of the couple became more prevalent. Couple all that with the abuse he says he witnessed as a child, and yeah, it’s not good.
Fast forward again to the Oscars. They skip speaking with the press on the red carpet, perhaps to avoid having the entanglement thrown in their face, as LaVerne Cox did at a previous awards show, only to have Regina Hall do it on an even bigger stage. Then Chris Rock makes a joke about Jada, a relatively mild joke, but a joke nonetheless. All of a sudden that little boy, who felt like a coward as a child is now a grown man who feels that he can’t allow someone to disrespect them publicly. After all, the Smith’s had already been picked on earlier in the show, and Chris didn’t go after Nicole Kidman’s husband’s highlights and frosted tips, but he chose to go after Jada’s bald head. Will initially laughs, then something happened and he snapped.
So why do I blame Jada? Well, first of all I don’t totally blame Jada. Ultimately Will is responsible for his own actions. But when you marry someone, two become one, and if one of you acts irrational, the other should be there to calm them down, not egg them on, or just sit back and watch. This was Will’s night, not Jada’s. Sure, Jada had no control over Chris Rock, and out of all the people and things he could have talked about, to pick on the appearance of a black woman who had already been picked on early in the evening was foul. But at the same time, this was Will’s night. This was not about Jada. Yes, Chris made it about Jada to some extent, and if Will wanted to defend his wife, he could have just yelled for Chris to keep his wife’s name out of his mouth from his seat, and that would have been sufficient. My problem is when Will got up and Jada didn’t stop him. It seems to me that Jada was more concerned about getting revenge on Chris, than this moment for her husband.
Another thing I noticed that reinforced my thoughts that Jada is jealous of Will is the way she acted on the red carpet before the show. Take a look at this video:
Now about 45 seconds in, Will holds his hand out for her to take it, but she didn’t. Instead she talks about going back to take more photos when the photographers had already gotten the shot. And, I don’t know, but I notice the little things. Sometimes it’s the little things that tell the story. Like don’t leave your husband hanging in front of a bunch of photographers.
But the thing that really got me, is when Will was in his feelings and he gave his acceptance speech. I was surprised he didn’t speak more about Jada and what she means to him. After all, he did just slap somebody to “defend her honor,” so I would have liked hear more about what this person meant to him, yet I didn’t get that. And that tells me that perhaps that slap was about something else other than defending his wife’s honor. Not saying that Will is the perfect husband, because again, I don’t know anything about them other than what I can gather from TV. My thing is this was Will’s night, and if the shoe was on the other foot and it was Jada getting the Oscar, I would say the same thing in reverse.
So anyway, overall what I got from it is that Jada cared more about getting revenge on Chris Rock than having this be a good night for her husband. I felt sad for Will. I felt sad for Chris. And I’m even more curious about Jada’s side of the story.
So many lessons to learn from this. So many stories to tell.
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